Supporting Someone with Eating Disorders as a Carer

You're doing something incredibly important. Supporting someone with an eating disorder takes tremendous strength, patience, and love. While this journey isn't easy for either of you, your presence makes a profound difference.

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The Reality of Eating Disorders

Eating disorders are complex, and they don’t develop overnight - they’re often the result of a mix of personal, emotional, and even genetic factors. If you're part of your loved one’s support system, your compassion and understanding will be crucial to their recovery. You don’t have to be a professional to make a difference; anyone can provide support, whether you're a parent, sibling, partner, or friend. But to give the best support, it’s important to educate yourself about what disordered eating is and what the recovery process may look like.

Keep in mind that recovery is a unique journey for each person, and it’s rarely a straight line. There may be periods of thriving as well as many challenges - and not just for them, but for you too. Supporting someone through this can be incredibly challenging, which is why it’s just as important for you to take care of yourself during this process. Educating yourself about eating disorders is key, but so is prioritising your own well-being as you navigate the ups and downs of recovery. Your mental and emotional health matters just as much and taking time to care for yourself will ultimately help you be the best support you can be for your loved one.

Some Tips for Carers, Families and Supports:

Education:

Education is crucial when you are providing support for someone who is experiencing an eating disorder. The more you know and understand, the better you can offer the right kind of help. Eating disorders are often misunderstood, with many myths and misconceptions surrounding them. They’re not just about food, weight, or body image - they often stem from deeper emotional pain and distress. Understanding that eating disorders can be influenced by a combination of biological, psychological, and social factors is key. Each person’s experience is unique. By educating yourself, you can approach the situation with compassion, empathy, and a deeper awareness of the complexities involved, ensuring that you can offer the most effective and supportive care possible.

Please see the below link for more eating disorder education information from the insideoutinstitute: https://insideoutinstitute.org.au/resource-library/resources-for-families-carers

Eating Disorders Carers Help kit from Eating Disorders Queensland (EDQ):
https://eatingdisorderscarerhelpkit.com.au/

Communication:

How you communicate with someone experiencing an eating disorder truly matters - it can make all the difference in their recovery. It’s important to understand that everyone’s needs are different, and what works for one person might not work for another. Some individuals might need more support around meal times because they struggle with accountability, while others might feel more comfortable having space and reaching out when they’re ready. The key is to create a safe, open, and non-judgmental space for honest conversations about what they truly need, even if it’s hard to navigate at times. Setting boundaries can be tough, but it’s important to approach them with kindness and respect for both their needs and your own. By staying open, patient, and willing to listen, you help foster trust and understanding, making it easier for them to ask for support when they need it most.

Support for Carers:

Supporting someone through eating disorder recovery can feel like a long, challenging journey, and it’s so important to remember that your well-being matters too. You can’t pour from an empty cup, so make sure you’re taking care of yourself along the way. Having your own support system is crucial - whether that’s a therapist or a close friend who understands the challenges you’re facing. It’s not just about helping your loved one; it’s about giving yourself the space to process your emotions, reflect on the ups and downs, and take a breather when you need it.

Recovery isn’t just about the person you’re supporting; it's also about finding moments for yourself to recharge, whether that’s through a hobby, a walk, or simply taking a break. By caring for yourself, you’re not only protecting your own mental health but also making sure you’re in the best place to continue offering your love and support. Don’t forget: you deserve care, too.

Some self-care tips:

• Practise setting boundaries without guilt - its ok to communicate how much energy you can give someone
• Prioritise your health too - ensure you’re getting enough rest and space when you need it
• Let go of the pressure to ‘fix’ everything -remember that your role is to support, not to solve

Support groups:

Carrying the responsibility of supporting a loved one with an eating disorder can feel isolating, but you're not alone. Many carers experience similar challenges and connecting with others who truly understand can be a huge source of comfort and strength. Support groups offer a safe space to share what you're going through, whether it’s the overwhelming weight of the long recovery process, the guilt or responsibility you might feel, or the difficult meal-time struggles that sometimes lead to conflict. These groups remind you that your feelings are completely valid and that there are others walking this path with you. It’s a chance to be heard, supported, and reminded that you’re doing the best you can. You don’t have to carry this burden alone.

There are several support groups available, please see the below links:

Eating Disorders Queensland (EDQ): They provide services for carers and key supports such as carer peer mentoring, coaching sessions and one day workshops. For further information please see:  https://eatingdisordersqueensland.org.au/carers-and-key-supports/#carer-connect

Eating Disorders Families Australia (EDFA): A national organisation that provides education, support and advocacy services for carers and families impacted by an eating disorder. https://edfa.org.au/

Butterfly foundation: This organisation provides virtual carer support groups and for anyone over the age of 18. These groups are facilitated by those with lived experience caring for someone with an eating disorder. They can understand and relate to what you are going through. The foundation also provide webchat carer support groups and are facilitated by specialist counsellors. https://butterfly.org.au/get-support/support-groups/carersupportgroups/

Eating Disorders Victoria (EDV): Provide carer coaching programs and courses for carers. The coaching program is an 8 week 1:1 online course. There are two other courses that EDV provide: a 6 week upskill course or a renew course of 4 weeks that specifically focusses on caring for someone who has had an eating disorder for more than 2 years. https://www.eatingdisorders.org.au/for-family-and-friends/edv-services-for-carers/

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